Season 1, Episode 5: Lend Me Your Ears
"Guy pulls a Tyson on me and I'm the one gets arrested?"
"Look, Evander, the way I saw it you were givin' as good as you got." -Joey
"I have, what some would call, a gambling problem. Correction. I AM a gambling problem." -Paul
"Let me tell you something. A guy bites off your ear. I send two of Chicago's finest bozos to hunt that ear down. We assume that that is your ear. Under no circumstances do we waste taxpayers' money proving to you that it's your ear." -Turk
"Officer Turk, would you slit this guy's throat? We need a little blood for the DNA test." -Turk
"Yeah, you told me once you liked cops. I just didn't know how many." -Joey
"Y'know, I'm thinking of asking Ginny out. You know if she's seeing anyone?" -Joey
Written by Gay Walch, Directed by Chris Long
Guest stars Kate Walsh, Lisa Brenner, Jacqueline Williams, Jeremy Ratchford, Rich Komenich, Dan Conway, Adam Tanguay.
Co-starring Tim Decker as Jerry Simon, Guy Van Swearingen as Lenny Egan, with Tom Keevers as Officer Polito, Richard Pickren as Captain Addario, Chick Richards as Waiter.